Things Happen for a Reason: Fighting Umbrella Corporation

On Friday the 13th, 7th month of Chinese calender, scary date indeed, to realise i suddenly woke up out of nowhere.

It was in an all dark room, not knowing where i am and why i am here. check muh own belongings, it seems like i am carrying weapons in a weird costume.. what on earth is happening???

Walking around the room, i found a mirror, i decide to take a look as it, as i'm curious why the hell am i dressed like this

poster

OMG... this is Alice... am i in Wonderland??? eh Crap.. Wrong Alice

ME in Alice body means??? i'm gonna face zombies? goshhh this is not working.. i'm only good at shooting zombies in L4D la.. why choose me? =.=

Suddenly i hear footsteps of people walking... being afraid, i pulled out muh gun and saw 2 human-like figure walking in... In fear, i shoot down one of them. The feeling was awesome!! to kill a real zombie and c his blood flying all over. Then suddenly, the other guy shouted "WAT THE HELL R U DOIN?"

GOod Job, 1st few minutes as Alice, i shot a human... the guy walk towards me and say that we nid to stop Umbrella Corp immediately as they are in the final steps of discovering the Ultimate Virus.

Owh yea, he also congratulated me for killing muh partner... Great~

So he assigned me a new partner, and the moment i saw her... i terus STIM (Boner). wait... where's muh cock? damn it! (how does girl's "boner" feels like? :/)

With no opportunity to "poke" her.. i shall just focus on the mission and not kill another partner.

Sneaking into Umbrella Corp is cool. Their Defense is SOOOO tight.. that i don even noe what to do.. L4D no Defense one k? I just masuk and shoot. Goshhh

After hours of thinking.. malaz laaa.. since i got "assets" now might as well i use it rite? so i use Alice's Airport body to seduce the guards in the front door, and asked Claire to kill them, with a silenced 5-7. Coool~

now we're in the Umbrella Building, with NO alarm and No sneaking.. woohooo.

1st thing i head to in da building is their weapon room! was too bored with handgun, dat wan for ALice to use only.. me? i choose THIS!

Weirdly, in the room behind the weapon room, i heard sound of ppl, u noe? "making love", whats more amazing is i only hear male voice.. ewwwww, decided to shoot thru the walls, and the sound stop.. OOPS~

in muh mind i was thinking this

Hope his "shooting" is still accurate after i shot him with muh ak~

so next is to head up to the research level and wipe out the scientists that are researching this crap. i don wan muh world to turn to L4D world weiii... i wan c chicks k?

so me and Claire went up and killed all the scientists without mercy, ermm i mean... without mercy for guys... TOLD U I WAN C CHICKS RITE?

then they finally started the alarms... acknowledging our arrival, the big boss of Umbrella decided to release his zombies.

His zombies is nth like L4D man.. all walk so slow.. i shoot and laugh onlyyy. The boss was SOOOO angry that he release his Big AXe guy

When he arrive he swing his big fat axe against muh partner, owh s**t i forget to intro, her name is Claire :)

i dive towards her and hugged her while pushing her down and avoid the axe.. OMG! i hugged a chick!!! but i can't get a boner!!! goshhhh i think i'm turning gay. Just when the Axe man was about to swing his awe down towards us, someone shot him, and made it dropped. We r save!!!

I look towards the guy and he was Chris!! Claire's brother and damnn he was hot!

I finally know what a girl's "boner" feels like!!!!

Actually... i still don't

niways with the big axe man down, we headed towards the boss room to finish him and umbrella corp off.

He beg for us not to kill him.. so i decided not to kill him, but to throw him towards his own zombies to kill him :), that dat

Final steps to finish it off? Bomb the whole place into pieces!!

I hoped it was just all a dream, bcuz i need muh body back to enjoy chicks!

and YES! it was really a dream, i woke up and look at the mirror
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